Thursday, July 05, 2007

Last note on English soil

Well, the end is here. The taxi arrives in 1 hour.... and I can hear Nellie saying 'Oh No!!!' repeatedly in the lounge. Seems rather appropriate somehow.

MASSIVE congratulations to Vicky and Steve... about time too guys! Vicky - I'm sure your folks are through the roof with joy for you. I really hope that God blesses you both richly and blesses us with the finances to be able to attend your big day!

On the one hand, I just want to be out of here now. On the other, I never want to leave. I can't bear the thought of leaving all my friends. I had a massive break-down and cry on Tuesday afternoon. After Nellie's nappy leaked all over the pram and I couldn't get the cover off to wash, following the horrendous day we'd had, it just all got too much. I sat and sobbed in the kitchen for a good half hour or more. Not just sobbed, more like waves of deep grief - I'm fairly sure that the grief of saying goodbye had tapped into my grief over Zoe, which explains why it was so deep and prolonged.

Still, I am looking forward to living in the same city as my parents again. I am looking forward to a proper summer (this British flash in the pan thing they call summer is really for the birds). I am looking forward to meeting some of the new friends I've made online in person. I'm looking forward to a new sense of purpose and direction. I am looking forward to getting back on track spiritually.

So... come on, taxi! Hurry up!
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