Every evening Nellie asks one of us to "stay with" her. What she means by this is that she doesn't want to be left alone. She's ok with us just standing outside her door, or being in our bedroom next door. Sometimes she's even ok if we "stay with" her in the lounge, although she prefers us nearer. It's not about where we are so much as it is that she hates feeling abandoned or isolated.
Last night I realised afresh how that feels. When G & I tag team around Nate, I sleep in the bedroom while G sleeps in the lounge. He will often close the bedroom door to try and prevent me being disturbed by noise from the lounge. While I really appreciate the gesture, I usually hate that. A closed door makes me feel cut off from the rest of the house. I hate feeling I can't hear what's going on. I hate feeling isolated or disconnected. When I asked G not to close the door last night, and he asked why, I suddenly had to give voice to something I'd only felt intuitively till then.
Now I realise afresh how Nellie feels. It's an awful feeling. Maybe now I will be a little bit more compassionate towards her at bed time....
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