Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Storms

The light at the end of the tunnel is a rubbish analogy when it comes to grief. A much better one would be a storm....

I'm sitting in my classroom, marking tests, with some music playing, when I suddenly realise that I'm singing out loud.

Enthusiastically. Loudly.

And it's a worship song.

Then it hits me - I'm no longer angry with God.

How did this happen, and when? I don't know. But it strikes me that I feel like I'm in a Cape winter storm. Above me a small gap has appeared in the clouds. I can see blue (grey) skies above me. The wind is still howling; the rain is still falling; but for a moment I can feel the warmth of the sun. I know that this may only be a brief respite from the anger of grief, but I'm going to revel in it while it lasts, remembering that 'summer' is just around the corner.

In the words of Geoffrey Rush's character in 'Shakespeare in Love': "It all ends happily. How? I don't know. It's a mystery."

4 comments:

Vicky said...

Here's hoping you'll be seeing more sunshine as the time goes by!

I loved the pictures of your house, it looks great! I love the garden and the outside/inside nature of it. Is it big or small by SA standards?

MazBrost said...

As with most countries, new builds are little boxes. (Can't even swing a cat in them little). In comparison to everything other than new builds, the house is probably average in size. I think it has more ground though, so a bigger garden, which makes it feel even more spacious.

Anonymous said...

So happy you are catching a break!

xo,
Jacqueline

baker st jones said...

it was great to read this, nicole.

i have not kept up wiht the blog really, but just read these last few recent entries

God bless

anita